Some people transform love into a spiritual emotion and when it reaches a degree beyond which there is no longer any desire for anything else. The secret love story of Sahir Ludhianvi and Amrita Pritam illustrates this type.
Amrita Pritam, an Indian influential writer of Punjabi, cut off all ties with the people around her and led an independent existence. She stood tall and held her head high while facing many challenges.
She began writing when she was a child after losing her mother. At age 16, she got married to Pritam Singh. This union did not last. Never did their hearts connect.
Sahir Ludhianvi was a poet and song lyricist He questioned how society handled women and wrote openly about the suffering of women. He became famous through the Bollywood songs he wrote and earned a lot of respect in the literary world.
Because of the discord in his parent’s marriage and the lack of a father-son relationship, he did not have a happy upbringing. He was primarily depressed and lonely. He started composing poetry at this time. Sahir rose to fame while still in college, he was referred to be a shayar (poet).
Both Amrita and Sahir had a silent love story. Love that cannot be expressed but is still felt long after both persons have passed away.
When they first met in Preet Nagar in 1944 while attending a Mushairah, their love story officially began. Each of them felt the other was really creative. They felt a strong connection with each other. It was here that she saw and heard Sahir for the first time. She was immediately smitten by him. ‘I do not know whether it was the magic of his words or his silent gaze, but I was captivated by him,’ writes Amrita of the moment. They wrote letters to one other to convey their love, and it appeared that they were addicted to one another. Amrita addressed him as “Mera khuda” “Mera shayar” and “Mera mehboob”. However, Amrita was unhappy at the time because she was married to Pritam Singh and had two children with him. A new sense of joy entered her life after she met Sahir.
The secret love story of Amrita Pritam and Sahir Ludhianvi arose when both began to converse, but they mostly kept to themselves. Sahir used to smoke discretely and leave. Amrita would start and smoke those cigarettes by herself after he left, and she thought the smoke from their spent cigarettes would mix in the air.
Even in her autobiography, Raseedi Tikkat (Revenue Stamp), Amrita writes of the eloquent silence that characterized their relationship:
“When Sahir would come to meet me in Lahore, it was as if an extension of my silence had occupied the adjacent chair and then gone away…He would quietly smoke his cigarettes, putting out each after having finished only half of it. He would then light a new cigarette. After he would leave, the room would be full of his unfinished cigarettes… I would keep these remaining cigarettes carefully in the cupboard after he left. I would only light them while sitting alone by myself. When I would hold one of these cigarettes between my fingers, I would feel as if I was touching his hands… This is how I took to smoking. Smoking gave me the feeling that he was close to me. He appeared each time, like a genie in the smoke emanating from the cigarette.”
Amrita was so devoted to him that she even divorced her husband and moved out with their kids to live by herself. But eventually, communication between them deteriorated. Because of his past, Sahir had a fear of commitment, and Amrita was aware of this. She asked him, “Maine toot ke pyaar kiya tumse, kya tumne bhi utna kiya mujhse?” in her final letter. She never made this decision because she was aware that this relationship would not endure long.
Amrita also writes Sahir’s side of the story in her autobiography saying, “Sahir also told me, much later in life, When both of us were in Lahore, I would often come close to your house and stand at the corner where I would sometimes buy a paan, or light a cigarette or hold a glass of soda in my hand. I would stand there for hours together watching that window of your house which opened towards the street.”
Amrita moved to Delhi after partition and was at the height of her powers. She wrote an immensely about human sorrow and love. Her writings and poems were universally recognized. Sahir, however, was reaching new heights as a lyricist for Bollywood songs.
Sahir and Amrita’s relationship was one thing that was failing. They split up and continued living their separate lives. Sahir fell for playback singer Sudha Malhotra, and Amrita embarked on a new relationship with musician Imroz.
Sahir and Amrita’s love did not have a happy ending, but theirs was a special kind of love. They kept on expressing their love in songs and poetry. A tragic yet beautiful love story came to an end at this point, and Sahir wrote:
تعارف روگ ہوجائے تو اس کو بھولنا بہتر
تعلق بوجھ بن جائے تو اس کو توڑنا اچھا
وہ افسانہ جسے تکمیل تک لانا نہ ہو ممکن
اسے اک خوبصورت موڑ دیکر چھوڑنا اچھا
Taaruf rog hojaye toh usko bhoolna behtar,
Taaluq bojh banjaye toh usko todna achcha,
Woh afsana jise takmeel tak laana na ho mumkin,
Use ek khubsurat mod dekar chhodhna achcha
Amrita came up with a creative way to overcome their separation. She started incorporating Sahir’s experiences into her writing works. His character played a significant role in the novels “Dilli Diyaa Galiyaan” (The Bylanes of Delhi), “Aakhari Khat,”(Final Letter) and an anthology of poems titled “Ik si Anita” (A Girl Named Anita). Sahir was the subject of her poem “Sunehray” (Messages), which earned her the Sahitya Akademi Award in 1956.
Another incident regarding the meeting of Amrita and Sahir’s mother in Delhi, it is excerpted from Sahir Ludhianvi: The People’s Poet, Akshay Manwani, Harper India
” ‘Maaji, yeh Amrita thi, janti ho na? Yeh aapki bahu bhi bann sakti thi,’(Mother, that was Amrita. She could have become your daughter-in-law). To which his mother replied, ‘Bete, bahu banao toh sahi kisi ko.’ (As long as you make someone my daughter-in-law.)”
To conclude, it’s truly a tragedy that being two literary giants, their connection was never able to transform into something more meaningful that could mirror their unique language and poetry.
