Discussing with the headmistress of a flagship school she commented “while the psychologist was sharing some tips with the parents in summer vacations parenting classes, a mother of an 11 years old commented that do they really need to be at bed at 10 pm?” At that moment, I realized the emphasizes this topic needs!
In this century, parenting has become challenging as every individual is busy. Parents are working two jobs a day to provide family. Mothers try their best to make their children feel loved, nurtured, and provide a healthy, growth-oriented environment while managing chaos in their professional life. Among this chaotic situation we have forgotten the basic etiquettes of parenting. Children learn by observing others and they will try to copy whatever they observe throughout the day even if it’s unhealthy. John B. Watson once said “Give me a dozen healthy infants, well-formed, and my own specified world to bring them up in and I’ll guarantee to take any one at random and train him to become any type of specialist I might select — doctor, lawyer, artist, merchant-chief and, yes, even beggar-man and thief, regardless of his talents, penchants, tendencies, abilities, vocations, and race of his ancestors.” This signifies the importance of the environment in which children are brought up.
It is understandable that listening to all the thrilling stories kids are telling at the end of the day is difficult after all the maniac routines we have almost every day, but we should keep in mind that active listening is essential to correct their learning.
In this agitated environment, parents oversee how they are reacting to the wrong acts of children. They tend to address the issue by yelling, shaming, or physically punishing them. These corporal punishments work for the moment but in the long run, they shatter the mental well-being and self-esteem of children. It is suggested that one should act with politeness and adopt this trait in themselves. As you can observe that the children who do not listen with politeness will not listen with harshness as well. So, it’s better to let go of the issue at the moment and address that later on by rationally talking to the child so that they develop an understanding of the encountered problem.
Thirdly, it is observed that parents expect children to learn from their advice and act upon them from an early age. The parents should understand that everyone goes through the similar experiences. The parents should see themselves at that age of their child and address their needs accordingly. We, at their age, wanted to listen to our parents, less intimidated in front of others. Therefore, we should understand their circumstances and try to act they way we wanted our parents to act. We can ensure by spending time with our children.
Finally, I would like to add, the need for family time is underestimated. It should be a family tradition where at least once a week or fortnightly for at least an hour, all members of the family should sit together without any distraction and spend time with one another. Incorporating these parenting skills will develop a strong, healthy, and loving bond between all members of society.
